How to Train Your Dragon as a 1950s Disney Classic: What If?
Fourteen songs, one square-jawed prince and a dragon who tap-dances mid-flight.
First, what was 1950s Disney like?
REAL: the 1950s gave us Cinderella (1950), Peter Pan (1953), Lady and the Tramp (1955) and Sleeping Beauty (1959). They were lush, colorful and musical, with clear heroes and villains.
REAL: the only dragon in a 1950s Disney feature was a villain: Maleficent, who turns into one at the end of Sleeping Beauty. Dragons weren't friends yet.
So what if DreamWorks' story of a boy and his dragon was made in that era?
Hiccup becomes Prince Bjorn
Square jaw. Perfect hair. Already the best warrior in the village. No doubts, no awkwardness, no prosthetic leg. He sings about dreaming of the sky.
Astrid becomes "the girl"
She sings a duet with Bjorn minutes after meeting him. Her main job is believing in him. Her one line: "I believe in you, Bjorn!" Then she gets kidnapped so he can rescue her.
Toothless becomes a wisecracking, singing sidekick
A chubby, big-eyed cartoon dragon with a jazzy voice who never stops talking about snacks. Mid-flight, he breaks into a tap-dance number: "Let's Soar, Kid!"
The villain: Baron Fangar
Big cape. Echoing voice, even indoors. He hates dragons for no reason. In the end, he falls off a cliff. Done.
The Vikings become comic relief
Gobber is a bumbling clown. Stoick is a big teddy bear. Every war council turns into a song about how much fun fighting is. One Viking sounds exactly like Winnie the Pooh.
The ending: a big musical finale
The villain is gone. Toothless winks at the camera. Astrid runs into Bjorn's arms. The whole village sings a reprise while fireworks go off. A golden storybook closes: The Dragon and the Prince.
What the original nails
How to Train Your Dragon (2010) is about a kid who doesn't fit in, who befriends the creature everyone fears, and who changes his whole village's mind. Hiccup and Toothless both end up with an injury, Hiccup loses part of his leg, and they become partners because each one helps the other fly.
What our version breaks
In our version, everyone is already perfect. Bjorn has nothing to learn, Toothless is a joke and the village never changes its mind about anything. Without the outsider at the center, there's no story, just songs. And the most important image in the film, a boy and a dragon who each fill in what the other is missing, disappears.
The lesson
Heroes who start perfect have nowhere to go. The best stories start with someone who doesn't fit, and let them change the world by being exactly who they are.
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